B. Skow (2011’s “Spread Eagle“) traverses some disturbing territory here, penning a number of segments which touch on the type of sexual fantasies most people have but don’t feel comfortable talking about openly. Rape scenarios, stalking, peeping toms and a young woman being sexually molested by a gang of brutish construction workers, these are just some of the things that await you if you dive into this film, so be prepared, kiddies. The third scene involving three young women sneaking into a neighbour’s pool and experimenting sexually proves the odd man out as it is both fun and erotic, and not in keeping with the dark tone of the rest of the picture. Not entirely sure how it ended up in this movie.
Nothing like a cute little rape scenario to get those moving on the right foot. *sigh* We open with Allie Haze (2011’s “10 Things I Hate About Love“) doing one of those deeply “personal” straight to camera address which have become all the rage with junk reality shows. Legs spread wide and wearing no panties, Haze explains the time she went to see a horror film with her boyfriend, Erik Everhard (2011’s “Beyond The Call of Booty 4“), and became overcome with lust during the screening. As her hand slowly fiddles with her crotch, Haze goes on to describe an incident that happened later in which Everhard went all van der Sloot on her one night and attacked her. This plays out for us. Oh, joy! Everhard, in a balaclava, jumps Haze in an empty parking lot and drags her off kicking and screaming back to his pad where he ties her up to a chair and orders her to masturbate for him. Afterwards, he reveals himself to her and she’s so taken by his (gulp) “romantic gesture” that she decides to screw him. Really, that works? Everhard should be writing books and shit. Chapter 1: How to Pick Up Women – Chloroform. Anyway, Everhard downshifts to full robot, tossing Haze an epic sexing void of feeling or emotion. Haze does what she does, even allowing the Canadian gorilla to spurt all up inside her baby maker while screwing her in reverse cowgirl. She farts it out onto the bed. Touching.
Next Jada Stevens (2011’s “Mandingo Massacre“) does a straight to camera bit, chatting about her decision to leave her hometown of Snellville (fucking Snellville) and about her first few months living in Los Angeles. In the process, she reveals herself to be a truly pathetic figure or a nut case or both. Friendless, car-less and with only a limited knowledge of the area (that’s why you leave the house sometimes), Stevens takes to hiding away up in her loft like a hermit. When not prancing around naked or ogling herself in a mirror, she’s checking out her next door neighbour, Jon Jon (2011’s “Gangland 79“), who lives across the street. Her infatuation with him (bordering on a truly unhealthy obsession), involves her spending long hours spying on him with his girl, attempting to get his attention by, I guess, rooting through his flowers, and making him salacious alcohol-fuelled videotapes in which she professes her love for him and, oh no, how she would like to marry him. Fuck, she doesn’t even know this guy… This is just sick! Sick, I tells ya! Dammit! I just spilled coffee on my What Would Christina Saunders Do? T-shirt and even got a little bit on the 10,000 word love letter I was writing to h-e… Huh? Wait… uh, yes, I was saying that this Stevens chick has an unhealthy obsession with a person she doesn’t know, and I find it worrisome. Troublesome, I tells ya! Anyway, at some point Jon Jon gets the video (or videos?) and decides to pay her a visit. Within minutes of him arriving, he’s got Jada all laid out on the bed and he’s cramming his black cock up her ass sans condom. OMG, so romantic! I know! Joking aside, Jada is fuggin’ hot! Like seriously hot. Jon Jon, on the other hand, seems distracted, looking around the room and barely paying his lovely co-star any mind, even when alternating between screwing her ass and screwing her pussy in a half-dozen positions. He shoots into her guppy-mouth and down her chest. She cleans him off, performing a little A2M in the process. I guess she really did love him.
First off, let me preface this by mentioning that layered over this straight to camera address is what sounds like an alternative version of Pink Floyd’s Goodbye Blue Sky. Utterly depressing music for a scene that is supposed to be acting as a titillation device, but, hey who cares, it’s fucking Pink Floyd or a reasonable facsimile. Anyway, busty blonde Tasha Reign (2011″s “American Dad XXX: An Exquisite Films Parody“) next tells of the time she and her husband first moved to Los Angeles and were welcomed by their next door neighbour, Mr. Pete (2010’s “Wet, Wild And Young 3“). “He was really interested in me,” Reign says of the meeting. Later on, she tells of the time her hubby went out of town on business, and she decided to put on an impromptu strip show for her neighbour, who had, at this point, taken to hiding in her bushes watching her. Creepy! Stevens and Mr. Pete should definitely hook up. Another time when her hubby went away, she tells of how she masturbated with her door open, an invitation for the psycho next door to join her. “I just wanted him to know that I wanted to fuck him,” she says. Wandering down to the steam room, she continues masturbating until he joins her. They move to a couch and have intense sex in about four positions. He shoots across her face and into her open mouth.
Oh dear god, I loved the next scene. Seriously, I was considering fast forwarding the rest of this biatch and then here comes Lexi Belle (2010’s “Nanny On The Job“), Allie Haze and Ella Milano (2010’s “Boffing The Babysitter 6“), possibly three of the most adorable women currently working in porn, doing this hilarious ode to sixties nudies movies (with a cool surfer soundtrack to boot). Looking for a little reprieve from the summer heat, Lexi, Allie and Ella (Lexi describes them as her “best friends”) sneak into their neighbours pool for a quick swim. Apparently the guy is away on business. Anywho, it’s not long before they are experimenting sexually as hot girls tend to do (yeah right, only in my mind). They decide to document their little underwater sexventure on video, something to be dropped in their neighbour’s mailbox, you know, as a thank you for letting them use his pool. Even with the funky camerawork, some of which is underwater, this scene was an absolute joy to watch. Everybody is having fun and there is a playful ambiance to the whole segment, as these three gorgeous young women groove on each other and the moment. There’s also some mucho full mouth on mouth French (er… freedom) kissing going on here. Is there anything more sensuous or erotic than the sight of two beautiful women enjoying a long hot French kiss? Seriously, is there? Of course not, that’s why adult filmmakers absolutely WILL NOT shoot it. If it isn’t going 100 miles an hour, then it’s not worth shooting, such is the mindset of most of the current crop of adult shootists it seems. I especially adore Milano and her “woot, woot, woot” squeals of ecstasy. So sexy! It easily ranks up there with Keli Richards’ “Fuck me hadda! Hadda!” although less aggressive. The girls take turns licking each other and making each other cum. Allie and Ella even do some scissor legged clit to clit rubbing while wading in the deep end. Epic awesomeness. “Best day ever!” Lexi mutters at one point. You bet! Fantastic scene!
Next, Allie Haze tells of the time when she walked by a construction site as a young woman and was met by the usual round of hoots and hollers. It changed her. “It made me feel like a woman for the first time,” she admits. Being degraded and objectified rocks! She begins to fantasize of being gang
raped fucked by the crew of working stiffs and devises a scheme to make it happen. It starts with her wearing provocative clothing during her strolls and culminates with her sneaking into their workplace and masturbating in hopes of getting caught. She is eventually apprehended by a lurking hard hat and soon finds herself living out her fantasy when the guys drag her to a backroom and gang-fuck her. The guys are Barry Scott (2011’s “Iron Man XXX: An Extreme Comixxx Parody“), Marco Banderas (2010’s “Candy Ass“), Evan Stone (2011’s “Twilight The Porno And Other XXX Parodies“) and Jerry (2010’s “Getting Off With Monique“). From what I can tell, this is her first ever group scene and she musters just the right amount of aggressiveness, filthy chatter and guttural nastiness to keep it flowing nicely, and the guys, all jaded fucks, interested. While she doesn’t do anal, she does get into the deep gagging near vomit stuff, which gets the guys going in a big way. Barry squirts on her pussy. Jerry and Banderas do a criss-cross double pop across her face and into her mouth. Stone drops last, delivering it across her face, tits and dress, which is draped around her midsection. She cleans him off.
Production Date: 07/25/2011. Release Date: 11/14/2011.
DVD Extras include a bonus scene culled from B. Skow’s “Fresh Picked” (scene 4) pairing up Lexi Belle and Steve Holmes. Also, there’s also a twenty minute behind the scene segment, shot by Ralph Long, featuring Allie Haze.