With the launch of his new Septo Studios in August and his sudden transition from gonzo to parodies, director Jordan Septo seems to be riding a creative high of late and the critics have finally started to take notice, absolutely showering his recent “American Dad XXX: An Exquisite Films Parody” and “Saturday Night Fever XXX: An Exquisite Films Parody” with both praise and award noms.

A bit of a whipping boy in the industry prior to, Septo endured a severe critical drubbing for his original porn parody projects, 2009′s “I’m Dreaming Of Genie 1″ (“falls way short of capturing the same sort of charm or appeal,” AVN wrote in their assessment of the film) and 2010′s “I’m Dreaming Of Genie 2″ (“flirts with barely being an average parody. It lacks oomph and has no opening credits or final follow-through—it just ends,” AVN said of it). In an industry that places emphasis on quantity versus quality, it’s nice to see Septo drastically scaling back the number of productions in order to focus more intently on the worth of the productions. What good are 19 movies (his release tally for ’09) if none of them are any good? Almost one year to the month of his launch of Septo Studios (and his shift towards more lofty projects), Jordan helmed “Tiny Teen Titties”, a straight-ahead gonzo flick featuring small breasted women engaging in volcanic sex.

 

In the first segment, Derrick Pierce (2007′s “Sweet Young Things 1“), a martial arts instructor from Massachusetts who got into porn after dating Lexi Tyler, interrupts Jesse Jordan (2010′s “Boffing The Babysitter 6“), a pretty Japanese-American, as she is checking out her tits in the mirror. He’s been hired by her father to paint her bedroom but, apparently, she never got the memo. Her protests work as Pierce agrees to let her talk it over with her father before he paints.  When asked by Pierce about what she was up to before he walked in, Jesse explains that she isn’t happy with the size of her boobs. Pierce admits that he thinks they are just fine, adding, “They’re sexy!” In between an avalanche of nervous chuckles,Jordanasks him if he would like to see them. Before long the two are rolling around in the bed, getting frisky.Jordan’s constant chatter and from-the-gut laughing seems to both annoy and arouse Pierce, who mutters to her, “You’re just happy as hell, aren’t you?” Pierce and Jordan make love in four positions.Jordanseems to genuinely enjoy the rough stuff, encouraging Pierce to slap her harder, choke her, finger her ass and even pull her hair.Jordanhas to scramble to get into position to take his load across her face and into her mouth. She cleans him off.

 

Pining for the arrival of her blind date, Ally Kay (2010′s “Sorry Daddy, Whitezilla Broke My Little Pussy 4“) begins to concede that she’s been stood up… again. Sascha (2010′s “Amateur Porn Tryouts“), the owner of the coffee shop for which her little rendezvous with romance was scheduled to take place, informs her that he’s going to be closing up and she’s going to have to leave. Kay laments the fact that she’s waiting for some guy she met online and is lonely. Sascha, sensing that this might go somewhere, offers her a sympathetic ear. “I’m single,” Sascha tells her, offering himself up as a substitute date. Kay is cautious, not sure what to make of the heavily tattooed German bloke, but eventually agrees. She suggests that they go out for drinks. Sascha has different plans, announcing in straight-forward fashion that he really just wants to go to bed with her, no doubt illuminating his reason for being single. Kay lays down to him her rule of no sex on the first date but is quickly contemplating breaking that rule, as Sascha plies her with his usual no-to-smooth German stuttered charm. Sex ensues. Colorado-born cutie Kay seems less inspired here as in other scenes (her scenes with other women are always the hottest) but she does get a chance to show off just how flexible she, doing the splits as Sascha drills her in about four positions. He spurts across her face and into her mouth. She cleans him off.

 

Shocked by the in-class behavior not to mention the choice of attire of one of his students, Ashlyn Rae (2010′s “Trash Talk“), teacher Mikey Butders has asked her to come by his office so he can start with disciplinary procedures. This isn’t Rae’s fist time getting into trouble and Butders informs her that unless she makes a real effort to change, he’s going to have to suggest to her parents that they send her to boot camp. To his surprise, Rae has no problem when his hand accidentally brushes against her crotch during a demonstration of proper short length. He decides to take it further, touching her tiny titties. She likes it. Of course she does. Later, Rae keeps a smile on her face as Butders drills her hard on his desk in four positions. He expels his genetic build-up across her face and intro her open mouth. She kisses the head but won’t clean him up.

 

Chastity Lynn (2011′s “Katy Pervy: The XXX Parody“), a Japanese college major who drifted into porn after meeting Ellie Idol, is next. She is looking positively dreamy in a short-short skirt (barely hiding her panties), hitting on her mother’s boyfriend, Alec Knight (2011′s “Boffing The Babysitter 8“). “I’ve heard you fuck my mom,”Lynnconfides to him, while straddling his lap and grabbing at his crotchular region. “This is so wrong!” Knight says, eventually going with it. They make love in about four positions on the living room sofa, culminating with Knight spraying semen atLynn’s face and into her open mouth. She swallows it down.

 

Picking up midway into the set-up (or at least it feels that way), Asian cutie, Amai Liu (2010′s “Don’t Tell My Wife I Assfucked The Babysitter 1“) is hauled into the office of school dean, Jenner (2010′s “Tough Love 19“), who is looking scruffier than usual, and forced to get undressed for his amusement. There’s some talk of tuition paying, so I’m guessing that they have some kind of sex for cash arrangement but that could just be me reaching. In an encounter fraught with racist overtones (talk of egg rolls and other nonsense) and a serious lack of chemistry between the participants, Jenner and Amai tick down the required positions until eventually arriving at a monster facial. Add to the mess, camera work which is atrocious (there’s a globe covering Amai’s face for some of the scene).

No condoms.

No production dates given. Release Date: 5/17/2010.

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