Originally released as “Superwoman” in 1979, one year after the box office juggernaut Superman, D.C. Comics and Warner Bros. were not impressed by this obvious send-up of their trademark character and they immediately brought a legal action against “Superwoman” producer Damon Christian and VEP. After a lengthy hearing, the judge ultimately ruled in D.C.’s favour and Christian and crew were subsequently forced to re-edit the film, including deleting all references to the character’s name, scratching out, literaly, the “S” logo on her costume and re-titling the film. They considered “Ultrawoman” before settling on “Ms. Magnificent.” According to lore, all copies of the film were recalled and destroyed, however, a version of the film was released on Beta and has lived on in bootleg form.

Story-wise, it’s not much different than the film/comic except the gender roles are reversed, oh, and there’s the obvious heavy emphasis on sex. Desiree Cousteau plays ditzy Linda Kent, a mild-manned L.A. Times reporter by day and a secret caped crusader named Superwoman by night. In keeping with the comic, none of Linda’s co-workers suspect that she’s Superwoman even though it’s so obvious.

When the film opens, we discover that Superwoman’s evenings have become somewhat of a routine, flying around Los Angeles, saving the same potential suicide victim night after night and screwing everyone she meets. Things change, however, when her arch-villian, the evil Kreeta Borgia (Jesie St. James), and her spock-eared alien minions, crash land on Earth and kidnap her boyfriend, played by Larry Davis.  It’s up to Superwoman to track him down and stop Kreeta before she can destroy the Earth. Tagging along for the ride is her nerdy editor friend, Clark Click (Mike Horner), and a hot up n’ coming reporter named Lois Lay (Holly McCall).

The special effects, for which there are no credits given, not surprisingly, are lame and below par. We’re talking light machine, shake-the-camera Star Trek-stuff here. It’s pretty clear that they weren’t even trying. Desiree, poor girl, is made to lay on a table in front of a green screen for the flying scenes, and it still looks pretty laughable. Plus, watch for some animated space sequences from the 1965 John Carradine movie ”Wizard of Mars” to creep into the film, probably without the proper consent.

In the opener, Desiree Cousteau (credits: Deseree Cousteau) arrives just in the nick of time to save a jumper (John Seeman) who is mere seconds away from taking a nose dive off a high rise. He’s in the entertainment business and can’t handle the lying and cheating he tells her, something we discover is a pattern for him. Cousteau decides to give him a reason to live, namely letting him fuck her. Moreover, fucking her in the ass. After some oral sex, they move from the rooftop to a small bedroom where they hump in mish, rc and doggy. He wants to fuck her in the ass and she agrees, however, before he can actually get to the insertion part, he’s busting off a load across her ass cheeks. Hey, ooops! Balding, ugly Seeman proves hilarious as he attempts to explain why he just wasn’t able to make the transition.

Captor Larry Davis finds himself being used and abused as Kreeta elects to make a replica of his penis made of Craptonite, a substance that, like Kryptonite, renders Ms. Magnificent/Superwoman immobile. Not entirely sure why Kreeta needed to make a replica of his penis especially since any penis will do the trick but, hey, who cares? A young looking Sharon Kane, as Kreeta’s assistant, is eager to see what all the hype is about and sneaks in to inhale his cock while he sits chained to a wall. While he’s not exactly cool with it, there isn’t much he can do so he decides to just sit back and enjoy himself. The scene is very brief.

In a great scene, Holly McCall visits an unemployed thug named Jake (David Morris) in hopes that he’ll supply her with some info regarding Superwoman’s missing boyfriend. Morris offers to tell her what he knows but only if she offers him something in return. Yup, he wants tail. They have a passionate little tussle, and he gets a little too-rough for Holly’s liking until she, well, likes it. They fuck in a bunch of positions including him slamming her against a wall, and later fucking her in the ass. Lots of slapping, cussing and all-around scrappiness, ending with Morris busting a load across Holly’s ass. Desiree Cousteau arrives to literally kick his butt across the apartment, stopping briefly to take matters into her own hands. Cocks are absolutely not supposed to bend that way. Ouch!

After being caught checking out their downed UFO, Desiree Cousteau takes on a pair of Kreeta minions in Vernon Von Bergdorf and Jesse Adams. It’s a quickie scene that features the boys trading off her pussy and mouth. Only Von Bergdorf is able to cum, shooting a load across her tits. She scrambles off to save Holly.

Jesie St. James visits the L.A. Times office to relay a message to Superwoman through reporter, Clark Click (Horner). St. James isn’t wearing any panties and Mike (last seen around here in “Carnal Carnival“) likes the view. Needless to say, things turn sexual pretty quick. Horner screws her on a desk before moving into an empty office, for some sex on a carpet fun. They do doggy and rc, ending with St. James suck/jerking him off across his stomach. Following the sex, she takes him hostage – leverage to draw Superwoman to her.

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Back at her apartment, Desiree Cousteau masturbates herself with a dildo to a Superman comic book (no shit!). It’s over pretty quick as a ringing phone breaks up the party.

Starr Wood visits Larry Davis to screw him and admit to him that she’s kind of in love with him. Even with one hand chained to a wall, Davis manages sex up Wood in cowgirl and reverse cowgirl. It’s a cute little tussle that ends with Davis pulling out and cumming across his own stomach. Afterwards, she releases him and they attempt to move Kreeta’s craft to no avail. Apparently they parked beside a tomato vendor and he isn’t above fighting for his piece of turf.

In a bizarre scene, Sharon Kane (last seen around here in “Flintbones“) find herself being interrogated by her leader, Jessie St. James, as they endeavour to find out the whereabouts of the suddenly missing Wood and Davis. Interrogation, in this case, means Kane having her pussy fisted by St. James. Vernon Von Bergdorf and Jesse Adams hold her down as St. James pushes in past the wrist. Kane, herself, pushes past the pain, arriving somewhere nice or fuzzy. She is all smiles by the time the boys decide to drench her tits in man-spunk.

Holly McCall and Mike Horner - Watching the fisting action are Holly McCall and Mike Horner, both chained to a wall. Horner finds himself strangely aroused and begs Holly to give him a handjob. She does it one better, jerking and sucking him off to a sizable orgasm across his own stomach.

Desiree Cousteau arrives to save Holly and Horner but soon finds herself being taken captive by the quick-thinking Kreeta. Jesie St. James fucks Desiree with a green Craptonite dildo as everyone watches. Yawn.

Just as Desiree Cousteau is set to expire from Jesie St. James’s Craptonite porking, two Brits (Freddi Nobodi and Liza Dwyer} arrive on the scene looking to buy produce. This turns St. James attention away from the task at hand as she decides to indulge the couple with a round of group sex. Huh? The prisoners are released and everybody joins in a big sexual free-for-all for no apparent reason. For pairings: Adams fucks Dwyer (this girl gets around here); Von Bergdorf eats Dwyer; Wood and Kane double up on Horner; Von Bergdorf fucks Holly; Kane eats Wood before Adams moves in to screw Kane from behind; Horner is blown by Dwyer; Nobodi screws Kane; St. James sucks off and screws Nobodi and takes his load across her face; Adams screws Wood and cums on her tummy; Adams screws Dwyer who eats Kane; Von Bergdorf is suck/jerked off onto Kane’s face.

With the sex finished, Davis rushes into the orgy like John Wayne, throwing punches at everybody. He saves a dazed Cousteau from sure death just as Kreeta blasts off into space. Ah.

No condoms

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